How NOT to grow weed (An anecdote)

So the Story continues: (start reading at the germination) I had a look at the paper towel and what I saw surprised and shocked me because instead of a few or none the goddamn seeds had ALL sprouted! 😳 😳 😳 So i kinda paniced a bit cause I did not know what to do with so many seedlings. But I was greedy and tried to save as many as possible since my existing 12 flowers were growing pretty shitty at that time.

And the Story continues: (part3) (start reading at the germination) I used up EVERY pot that I had ( and i had A LOT pots ) and put 3, 4 or more - up to 12 or 16 per pot. It was pure madness and after I had used up all my pots I still had a fuckton of seedlings laying around. I knew I had to put them in soil asap. But it was already late at night and so I came up with an idea to go grab some pots from the graveyard where they have big containers for all kinds of waste. You can find all kinds of pots there and even trays and whatnot... So I got myself a flashlight and went out- side in order to get me some more pots. ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part4) (start reading at the germination) So I went out at night with my flashlite in order to get some pots from the graveyard waste containers... I managed to dig out some nice pots yet most of them were either too big or broken and there really was not much to find cause i had been there few days prior and already fished out all the good pots. Also it had rained and i could not climb into the containers since they were half full with stinking brown water... A bit disappointed I went to go home when I realized another location to find me some pots: There was a old glashouse with half its windows broken only a few streets from the graveyard. So I went there to see if I could find some more pots for my pot. ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part5) (start reading at the germination) So I went out at night with my flashlight in order to get some pots from the graveyard but couldnt find much and went to go to the old glashouse with half its windows broken. When i arrived at the nursery I looked around with my flashlight and found some pots but they were made of stone (clay idk) and heavy as fuck and many were broken. The shit was just too heavy. So I tested if I could open the doors and go inside - that damn door made hell of a noise but I couldnt open it. In a quite village at midnight the sound was just out of the world.. At that moment two people came along the street who deliver magazines. So I instinctively hid behind some bushes and waited for them to pass by. After they were gone I inspected another glashouse and managed to slip in through an old already broken window. And there I found pot paradise! Jackpot! 😃 ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part6) (start reading at the germination) So I went out at night with my flashlight in order to get some pots [...] and went to go to the old nursery with half its windows broken and slipped inside and found a lot of nice pots. 😃 I gathered up maybe 20 or 30 and decided to come back later if I need more. (there were hundrets laying around in relatively good condition) Proud of myself I climbed out of the glasshouse and went to go home... I made it till the (at that time of the night empty ) main street and didnt even cover up my proud findings. When suddenly a car came driving along that slowed down as the driver saw me walking at the sidewalk... ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part7) (start reading at the germination) So I went out at night to gather some pots and found a lot of them at an old nursery. On my way home at the empty main street I walked with like 20-30 pots in my hand on the sidewalk when a car came up from behind that slowed down and stopped when it reached me. First thing I noticed was the weird installement on its roof: It had a lightbar on top! 😳 My heart skipped a few beats and my life flashed in front of my eyes when I saw two cops jump out that came into my direction. At this point I went from: "I am a master genius" 😎 to "Oh fuck! I am fucked!" 😵 real quick. So I just stared at them in disbelieve holding a staple of pots in my arm. The cops approached me and I realized in a splitsecond that the guys who delivered the magazines must have called them. ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part8) (start reading at the germination) So there I was: In the middle of the night, holding an arm full of pots stinking from weedsmoking with 2 cops coming at me while at home I had a grow tent packed full with 312 plants. I am proud to say that i did NOT shit myself at that moment. The cops asked for my name and adress and after I foolishly told them both there was no point in running away anymore. I knew i had fucked up big time. They let me blow into a breathalizer (which showed zero) and searched me for firearms - the one guy even squized my butcheeck - I bet he was gay or just testing if I was relaxed. Let me tell you: I WAS NOT RELAXED AT ALL! However the cops were from another departement and soon a second car arrived with 2 more cops arriving. So now there was 4 cops, 2 cars, around 25 pots and one stoner: Lucky me. 😑 ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part9) (start reading at the germination) So I got caught stealing a handfull of old pots by the police. The first set of cops went on their way leaving me with 2 cops. they then asked me some questions that I dont really remember anymore. I just know that it was autumn and there was really NO logical explanation why a guy with red eyes that smelled like pot would need so many pots at that time of the year so urgent that he would climb into an nursery to steal them in the middle of the night. They confiscated my proud findings but were not sure what do with me and after some time they specifically told me to go home. And that COULD HAVE BEEN the end of that story ... BUT they had other plans. 😕 ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part10) (start reading at the germination) So I got caught stealing a handfull of old pots by the police. They confiscated my proud findings and specifically told me to go home. And that COULD HAVE BEEN the end of that story ... BUT instead of driving away THEY FOLLOWED ME in their fucking car!! 😵 So I walked down the main road in a small village at night followed step by step by a cop car with its damn blue lights making it a surreal scene. Again I thaught about running away but there was really no point since they already had my data and knew where I was heading towards. I guess they wanted to see if I would throw something out of my pockets that they could then find or maybe they just had a good laugh in the car - idk. So i walked .. and walked.. And at some point I think I even came back to being a believer asking god if he had fun while I was walking down the blue flasing lit empty street. (I was an atheist up untill that day) ... (continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part11) (start reading at the germination) So the cops followed me home in their car and I was hoping they would eventually get bored and drive off but they just kept driving at walking speed behind my ass. It was not a long distance - however it felt like eternity since my mind was raceing knowing far well that I had 300 small baby plants at home in a seperate room that wasn't even closed since I let the door wide open when I left for pot hunting. When we arrived at my home they got out of the car again and we discussed for short time. They wanted to see my ID and I told them I was going to get it. So I went inside and let the door fall back into its lock behind me then I ran and quickly closed the growroom door, locked it and hid the key, got my ID and came back out where the two cops waited. I showed them my ID and hoped that they had seen enough now and would drive off... HOWEVER God ( who must have laughed his ass off the whole time) and the cops had other plans... They now wanted TO GO INSIDE!!! Oh and did I mention that it was 3 o'clock in the morning at my landlords birthday?? Anyway... ( continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part12) (start reading at the germination) So it was around 2 or 3 o clock in the morning at my landlords birthday and the cops now wanted to go inside. I started a discussion about that this is not even legal but they insisted and said if I dont comply they would come back with several men and a dog and search the whole house from top to bottom for a few hours. I was pretty sure he was just bluffing but at the same time my nerves were grinded down and I hoped to avoid a scene at my landlords birthday so I caved in and let them inside. There they looked around for drugs and similar stuff - which were not hard to find since my bong was standing right behind the entrance door and here and there was a few buds laying around that were not even fully dryed out yet but I smoked them in that way sice I had no other weed that was dry cause as I mentioned earlier my plants up until then were growing shitty and i had no money to buy some. Also you cant buy weed in germany cause its all mixed with chamicals - but that is a whole other story. So back to them searching my rooms: They found earth and fertilizers and dope and at my pc there was a chat open with a guy called herbalist and a website that explains how to grow weed and whatnot. So it was pretty unquestionable what was going on. At one point one of them tried to open the growroom door but as it was locked he just gave a quick wink to his collegue. (like: "this is it!" kind of wink - you could hear the vents inside giving a extra loud special concert of their sucking power...) When the room tour was over ( except for the closed room with the door alarm on it ) they started to ask me further questions and I told them the truth about my recent breakup and my depression. It was pretty obvious that they knew 100% exactly what I was doing. Then they said something like: "Ok come with us!" And since the only room left to search was the locked glory room I was sure they would now force me to open it and then i would be fucked since there were a total of 312 plants in a small tent. However.... ( continue reading next week)

And the Story continues: (part13) (start reading at the germination) It was pretty obvious that they knew exactly what I was doing. Then they said something like: "Ok come with us!" And since the only room left to search was the locked grow room I was sure I would go right to jail since there were 312 plants cramped together in a small tent. However.... They just walked by the humming door! I couldnt believe my own eyes. Where they THAT stupid???? (ofc not) We then talked for a few more minutes and they specifically told me NOT to grow weed at which point I could only nod and stutter something like "Uhmnkay" while staring at them in utter disbelieve. When they finally drove off I still couldnt believe what had just has happpend. Was it just a dream? Was it a bad trip? No! That really happend!!! I was still shaking from the adrenaline rush several minutes later. Then the paranoia set in and I quickly removed all plants as fast as I could before the sun rises. I was sure they would come back with dogs and handcuffs and going to search the whole house when they return so I had to be quick. When the sun finally rose I was a wreckage: Dirty, tired, sweatty, with my nerves grinded down I waited for them to return and storm my landlords birthdayparty. ( Continue reading next week )

(part14) (start reading at the germination) So I went to bed and slept ... not very well. When I woke up I still waited for them to return and storm the party that was going on in the upper floor. But they didnt show up. The guest left and when the night came I made a brave decission and decided to stand in for my believes and values even if it meant going to jail for weed. So no 24hours after I evacuated them I brought back the plants and put them back in the tent. - Of course it was total overkill and I may have lost a few in the action. The following weeks were pure madness: I had pots stacked on top of other pots and plants everywhere in between them. Then I experienced some bugs that I thought were maybe mites so i ordered fly larva to kill them off. However the mites were actually thrips and the fly larva must have been dead when they reached me. So to make a very long very sad story short i had to throw them all out but then I reused some soil and so I infected my next grow and so on .. I fought against bugs for months untill I finally gave up, threw all out (again) and cleaned my tent with rubbing alcohol. It was all a wild ride and I harvested little to nothing for many many months Now I grow tomatoes and salad in my tent and pretty soon there will be some autoflowers going to replace them when it is warm enough for the tomatoes to go into the garden. But that is another story that you will be able to follow in my other diaries. Wish me luck!! I really could need some nice buds. Anyway hope you enjoyed my little story on how NOT to grow weed and learned maybe a thing or two. What I learned is there is different pests and how to fihjt them off. But more importantly I learned that not all cops are bastards - some of them are "horny swines" as we say in germany if some- body acts like an asshole but is actually a pretty cool dude. So ACAB is not true! I think what saved me was my lack of money - Would I not be piss poor and drive a nice car instead of an rusty bycicle they would have assumed I was a dealer and then they would definitely have fucked me. So poverty saved my ass again. yey! 😅 Also I was not cursing at them or did stupid stuff - We discussed without yelling and I complied so that may have played wa role in how they treated me. So be nice to each other even if it is a cop you are talking to! PEACE! & 👉 LET IT GROW! 👈 DQMYNATOR 2023

(start reading at the germination)