is this mold or mites or something else?

after some more research it is definitely bud rot :-(

Water does not wash away the spores. Throw it out, I wouldn't even extract this and turn it into distillate or anything too. Even though all visible mold may be gone, there are things called mycotoxins and aflaxtoxins that get produced by these molds, and they can cause serious damage to you and your lungs.

yes that is mold, man sorry to see that. you could make hash out of this so you would still be able to get a harvest or at least a partial one, when you make hash the water will wash away the mold and leaving you with a golden treat, if you dont want to make hash you can cut away any mold you can see and find, leaving you will some what hesitant flowers to smoke on, thers many ways to make hash, just look it up. it is real easy. hope this helps

I had the same problem, it can happen with the bigger buds (apical) when they are almost overripe, and maybe there's too much humidity and not enough air circulation, and MOLD 100%. Check all the buds, separating the moldy ones from the healthy ones. Try to remove as much mold as possible and let them dry well in the right conditions! If it gets worse, I recommend extraction with pure alcohol using the nice dry moldy weed. Good luck!