The First Ladiez

Mon 27 Sep 2021 - D64-22F - My new fucking watering can came. Ladiez be like, fucking skank bro. Fucking tight bro. All the ladiez, bro, going to love my new fucking watering can bro. (For reference: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5QJ9i_o5vo). I got way too excited about a watering can, but this is apparently what adulthood is about [pumps fist three times]. You know it! YOU KNOW IT!!!! We have to keep it together, we've come too far, WE HAVE TO KEEP IT TOGETHER, KEEP OUR COMPOSURE [grabs chair, begins slamming into lockers] (For reference: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NrnXsWJCISY). Am I funny? In a vacuum, probably not as I need oxygen to breathe out funny from my mouth parts... [Sidles away slowly to the side, waves from three feet away, stays there, ignores you] Go away now. (But please, do come back!) Tue 28 Sep 2021 - D65-23F - Clearly someone is a glutton for my nonsense. I did nothing. Opened the door, snapped a pic, and politely closed it. Did I sing to the plants? What did I sing you ask? "TAXI!" [zooms away] Wed 29 Sep 2021 - D66-24F - Liquid kelp arrived and the ladies are giddy. Smells pretty good, like molasses. Fun fact not related to anything, a large vat of molasses once exploded in the North End of Boston unleashing a tidal wave of molasses! A few people died, so I guess more a fun, somber, fact. Anyway... I figured I'm going to work it into the watering cycle again next week when I give them ground up fish bones again. Watering schedule is squid ink, plain water, liquid kelp, mosuito cake water, plain water (over a seven day period, real inexact stuff, cannot stress this enough). Only gonna make those broken joints stronger as some would say they have a predilection for phosphorous. I do believe [Fans face coquesttishly, bats eyelashes until they seal shut]....not again. Thu 30 Sep 2021 - D67-25F - I opened the door and took a video. Is it in 4k? Fuck if I know. Am I am pro cameraman? No, but I'll gladly do weddings; love that atmosphere! Fri 1 Oct 2021 - D68-26F to Sun 3 Oct 2021 - D70-28F - What happened Saturday? They grew more, duh 😂